it wasn't lemon gatorade
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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