You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
