You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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