how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize