My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
