Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Randomize
