My room smells like vodka and shame
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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