at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize