Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Randomize
