I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
