My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
