You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
