Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
