I just made out with a guy for $7.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
