I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
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