were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
