you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize