yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
