you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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