...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
organizing the empties. That sober.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
