Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
