I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
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