He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
sarcasm needs its own font
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
