Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Do vagina's smell?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
