I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Randomize
