What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
