He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
