theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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