and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
