does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
