just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Pants are for mortals
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
