Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
