And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
