Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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