I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
