you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
