Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Randomize
