it wasn't lemon gatorade
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Randomize
