This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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