spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize