Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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