their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
