During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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