I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Someone signed my nipple.
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