We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
