yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
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