i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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