So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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