Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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