dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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