Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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