Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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