I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Randomize
